How do you become responsible and mature enough to be able to become independent?

Grecia,

    I get it growing up can be scary but being and wanting to be prepared is half the battle! The biggest thing I could recommend is learning Money and balancing your checkbook.  There are Financial Classes that you can take or as well you can go into a Bank and they can help walk you through the steps. Know that there are people in your corner and willing to help answer any questions and don't be afraid to ask!

Emily

Grecia,

It really is not all that complicated. You have been making increasingly responsible decisions all your life. While a toddler decides between eating his cereal and throwing a tantrum, students have to decide between shooting hoops and writing a book report. How soon before that report is due? It's all about priorities and judgment. If you already own a car, you know that if you have a few extra dollars it might be better to hold onto it, because you will likely need it for car repairs sooner or later. If you have participated in school activities, you know about showing up for practice, and the consequences if you don't.

When you are truly independent, you will have bills. If you have bills, you have a job. If you have a job, you do what you have to so you don't lose it. That means you show up on time, have a good attitude, treat the customers right, find something to do to stay busy if it is slow, etc. It also means that you take care of your car, and your health. You need to be physically able to work, and able to get there! You think about "PLAN B." you leave to go to work, and the car won't start. Now what? If you try to fix the car, you will be late. If you are going to be late, you give them a call. Don't leave them guessing! Instead of being late, can you bum a ride from a neighbor or relative or friend? That might be the better option.

Honestly, it is the consequences that often times shapes our judgment. When my son first moved out, he was in a situation where his supervisor chewed him out in front of customers. A bunch of co-workers egged him on, telling him how he shouldn't take that. Rather than talking to the boss, or the boss's boss, he quit. His girlfriend (who was living with him), was really upset. "How are we going to pay the rent?"

Money management will be important. You will need to learn to distinguish between wants and needs. Cable TV, for example. There are many decent alternatives that are much cheaper. You will learn over time. For example, let's say you want to build a room divider in a large room. You look at various lumber and wall options, figure the cost, add 8% for sales tax, and think that's it. $350. I always add 15-20% to a project estimate. It covers when things go wrong, another tool you need but don't have, etc.

Another example. You need to travel 500 miles to go to a job interview. The computer says you can do it in 7.5 hours. However, I have found that I travel at the rate of 50 miles per hour, even when using highways. This would take me 10 hours. That covers for traffic, road construction, rest stops, meals, etc. If you were to allow yourself only 8 hours, you'd probably be late or very stressed out when you get there!

These are things that all come from experience. Lacking experience, the next best thing is to have some people in your life who already have some experience, who seem to make good decisions. Don't hesitate to ask for input! In the end, the decision is yours. If it doesn't work out, do not blame anyone else!

Bottom line: you will make some mistakes. We all do! It is part of the learning process! Do not make mistakes that will affect the rest of your life: DWI, criminal activity, etc. It really is not worth it. I strongly encourage you to start learning the basics of money management. It will be very valuable to you in the future.

Let me know if you have any questions! Be confident in yourself. You already know more about this than you realize!

Kim