I'm in 8th Grade and my parents are making me go to Early College High School, which does not have a band. I really enjoy band and I really don't want to give it up, but I'd like to have the benefits of going to ECHS. Any advice on making a decision? (P.S. I know somebody who goes there and I only hear horror stories from them. )

Alexis,

What are your career aspirations, or, do you have no idea yet? (which, is perfectly okay!).

Try to keep an open-mind about the school, and not let the horror stories give you pre-conceived notions. If you enter the school expecting it to be bad, you will find something bad about it to dislike! When you go through life looking for good, it makes you feel better about yourself and the whole world around you. Yes, expect the work to be hard. Expect the teachers to be demanding. You will have to find your own "happy." I would do that in English or Foreign Language class, writing essays on really bizarre stuff (but keeping within the parameters of the assignment).

If your parents want you to go, it doesn't sound like you will have much choice. Sorry 'bout that. I hope you find it's not as bad as expect it to be. And, it will put you ahead academically, which, in the long run, I hope you will some day be able to appreciate. You are at a tough age! Wishing you the best!

Kim

Hi Alexis, I, too, was in band during 8th grade and can understand your passions and enjoyment of being a band member. Early College High School programs have been a tremendous help for many students in preparation for success in college and achieving future career goals. So, although it certainly must feel devastating to lose a fun and special activity with classmates, it sounds like your parents only want what’s best for you. Perhaps you can still join in with your classmates during their after school practices? Or when you start the ECHS year maybe you can start a band club at that school with other music-minded students? Having hobbies outside of academic courses is extremely valued by college admissions boards so I would encourage you to keep it up. It could also help with scholarships to college!

Well if they're making you there isn't much you can do about the decision, but you can make sure that you stay dedicated to your instrument and pursuit of music. If you practice enough they might see how much you care about it and reconsider their decision.

Why are these other adults trying to remind you that your parents are best at making decisions for you and hopefully you'll see what they're doing 'in your best interest'? You're a kid with emotions, you're not going to and frankly shouldn't see the upside of being forced to do something you don't want to. Negative experiences exist because something bad happened, not because people like to irrationally lower someone's expectations so that things 'aren't as bad as they seem.' The ECHS sounds awful, so find something that you can control that will make you happy.

First, don't listen to the horror stories - people like to exaggerate their woes so they feel better about themselves. Look at it as an opportunity. Second, music is cool, but you do not need to be in band to develop your talent and enjoy it. You can do this in any school, even ECHS. Last (and in this case perhaps least) your parents are looking out for your long term interest, as they have been around for a few years more than you, and while they might not completely understand what drives you, they really do want the best for you. That said, you are your own person, and will need to make the decisions that are best for you. If after considering everything you decide that ECHS is not right for you, then you need to let your parents know this and why. They will understand and while they may still pressure you to go, in the end they will do what they see as best for you.