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should I follow my passion or my parent's advice?

12th Grader.

college school higher-education
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Subject: Career question for you
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Divya’s Answer

Hey Josphat,
It is always good to follow your passion. Do what your heart says. I think following your passion makes you feel happier in your life because your career is something you have to live with and not someone else. One should definitely consider the opinions and suggestions of your parents and see the advantages and disadvantages of what they are asking you to do. Like Kyle said see what they are asking for. Is it completely different from what you want to pursue or is it aligning with your goals and will aid or help you achieve your ultimate goal? An added advantage to it is, if things were to go not as expected, you would be happy knowing that at least you did follow your heart, you gave yourself a chance. I would say listen to everyone, but always do you. Good luck!
Hope this helps.
Thank you comment icon Thank you, Divya for the advice. Josphat
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Scott’s Answer

Hi Josphat,

This is a great question, and one that many people struggle with.

Do you have Netflix? There's a wonderful movie about exactly this topic. It's called "Three Idiots". It's in Hindi, but you can watch it with English subtitles. I promise you, this movie is absolutely brilliant and you will love it. It is funny and insightful.

To cut to the chase, the answer is "follow your passion". The Three Idiots movie is about how peoples' careers tend to be chosen at birth, by their parents. The stars of the show are the three idiots who are close friends. Two of them are failing and borderline dropping out of the University, but one of the idiots is the most brilliant student that the University has ever seen. Why is he labelled an "idiot"? Because he doesn't work the way most students work in the University, and the Professors do not believe his way of learning works. But over time, it becomes more and more apparent that this kid is more brilliant than them and headed to be a great scientist of the future.

Eventually, the two other idiots wonder why he does so well and they are failing. He answers "I succeed because building machines is my passion. I have been doing it my whole life and I love it. If you want to succeed, you need to follow your own passion." This was a quite a challenge for the other two idiots because that's not what their parents expect from them, and it is hard to go against their parents' dreams. But in the end, they eventually do follow their passion and become very successful in doing so.

Now having said that, don't 100% neglect your parents' advice. They will have insights on career choice that will benefit you. But if you do not feel passionate about what they want you to work on, it's hard to succeed. I suggest talking to them and explaining how you feel. At the end of the day, you choose your life -- not them, but do so in a way that is respectful and appreciative of how much they are trying to help.

Wishing you the best of luck.
Thank you comment icon Thank you, Scott! Josphat
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Eric’s Answer

Josphat, of all of the people that know you, your parents should know you best. They have seen you grow up and have seen how you respond to various real life situations and, hopefully, they are a valuable resource of wisdom to guide your future. So, I definitely suggest considering and valuing their advice. But, considering and valuing advice advice are not the same thing as following it. Ultimately, you need to follow your passions. Maybe, after considering your parents' advice, you decide that your passion will become your career or maybe it will just be a hobby that is an integral part of your life. So, don't lose sight of your passion. Hold on to it closely while you weigh the importance of your parents' advice. Over time, things will become more clear. I hope you arrive there soon.
All the best,
Eric
Thank you comment icon Thank you for taking the time to help. Josphat
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James’s Answer

There is not a simple answer here. Your parents are supposed to care and provide for you. I'm sure that yours love you very much. If they offer you advice, you should always listen, but don't make your decision based solely off of what your parents say.

On the other hand, chase your passion. You don't want to find yourself one day staring at the clock because your career brings you no joy.
Thank you comment icon I appreciate this, thank you for the advice. Josphat
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Jessica’s Answer

That's always a really hard question to ask yourself. When you look to your future, I feel it's always best to do what you're passionate about. You're going to put your best efforts in and be more likely to succeed because you want to. I am happy I chose my passion because it makes me a happier person doing what I love which makes me a better provider to my clients as well as for my family.
Thank you comment icon Thank you for sharing your perspective. Josphat
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Kyle’s Answer

I like Jessica's answer, but will also add the extremely helpful "it depends!" Is their advice trying to talk you out of pursuing your passion ("No one makes it as a musician!") or are they suggesting you do something extra to support your career ("Please also study business so that you don't get stuck with bad contracts and no options")? Speaking from experience, it feels GREAT to follow your passion...but if that career doesn't work out, it sure is nice to have other options on the table.
Thank you comment icon Thank you, this is amazing! I really needed it. Josphat
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Courtney’s Answer

You definitely want to follow your passion. I'm pretty sure your parents have your best interest at heart and want to see you succeed but you still have to look at the bigger picture as well. If you follow your parents advice and end up somewhere you truly don't want to be, then you will only be wasting valuable time that you could have spent doing something you truly love. If you don't love what you do, you are less likely to do your best and give it your all. At the end of the day you don't want to end up miserable doing something that you don't love. Now your parents advice could always be a plan b. That's not a bad idea. Even if you were to try out your parents advice first and then come back to what your real passion is, that's okay as well as long as you have plan b. But I think the most sensible thing to do would be follow your passion and see where it takes you.

Best wishes for your future!
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Shaye’s Answer

I find that parent's advice is usually what they feel is the most realistic and reliable for you. Their advice on career is not always going to be recession proof, or forever lasting since there are always ups and downs in the economy. Ask yourself are their advice something you don't mind doing? Would you regret listening to your parents if you ended up hating what you do? At the same time, evaluate how realistic your passion can turn into a money generating job.

My mom listened to her parents and ended up in jobs she didn't have a lot of interest in (Electrician), she don't regret it but said if she were to choose again she would have chose her passion which is to become a Nurse. When it came to be my turn both of my parents were hands off and let me chose my own career path. I'm thankful for that and was able to pursue what I was interested in which was to become an Engineer. I had my high school teacher help me make the decision as well. I believe pursuing your passion should be thought of first, but talk to your mentors, school teachers, industry professionals, to find out if it's a viable long lasting career.
Thank you comment icon Thanks for the advice. Josphat
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Juan’s Answer

There is no doubt about it, you should 100% follow your passion. However, we should always have the big picture in mind. Like Derek mentions, it is VERY important to have a plan B. Most people regret not following their passion, you hardly see people regret that fact that they followed it.

Of course, the passion has to be within reason, but if there is one thing that is for certain, there is no limit to our potential.

As the saying goes, "if you are going to dream, might as well dream big!"

best of luck!
Thank you comment icon Thank you, this is really helpful. Josphat
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