3 answers
Genevieve
Student
Cedar Rapids
78
Questions
Asked
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How do I prevent my self-criticism and self doubt get in the way of my writing?
Becoming a writer has been something that I've wanted to do since I was a little girl. However, I struggle with expressing myself, and I tend to become really critical of my work, and I usually give up. Is this a sign that I'm not meant to be a writer?
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3 answers
Dr. Kelly Desso
Protective Services
235
Answers
Somers, Connecticut
Updated
Dr. Kelly’s Answer
Tackling self-criticism and self-doubt in writing might seem tough, but with a bit of patience and regular practice, it's entirely doable. I remember feeling unsure while doing my doctorate, a journey filled with endless writing tasks. The more I pondered over an assignment, the more I realized I could improve it. This meant I had to come up with a game plan, or I'd never reach the finish line.
One strategy I adopted was to aim for an 87% score, which was the bare minimum to pass my program, instead of always shooting for a perfect 100%. While this might seem like setting a low bar to some, remember that finishing a course is the ultimate goal. Feedback is a great tool, but it's important to be choosy about whose opinions you take to heart. Not all advice is beneficial, so it's best to seek constructive criticism from people you admire and trust. There are resources like writing centers, peer tutors, or department specialists that can provide valuable assistance.
Practicing mindfulness, such as meditation, can help you observe your thoughts and feelings without judgment. This can lead to a more balanced view of your writing and yourself. When you achieve something, no matter how small, take a moment to acknowledge and celebrate it. This can help combat negative self-talk and boost your confidence. Remember why you love writing and reconnect with your passion for storytelling or self-expression. Keeping your purpose in mind can help you push through moments of self-doubt.
Finally, if self-criticism starts to feel overwhelming, it's perfectly fine to take a breather. Sometimes, taking a short break from your writing can bring fresh clarity and perspective.
Recognize negative thoughts: Pay attention to when self-critical or self-doubting thoughts arise. Awareness is the first step to challenging and changing them.
Challenge negative thoughts: When you catch yourself thinking negatively about your writing, challenge those thoughts. Ask yourself if there's evidence to support them or if they're just assumptions.
Practice self-compassion: Treat yourself with kindness and understanding, especially when you're struggling with self-doubt. Remember that making mistakes is part of the learning process, and every writer faces challenges.
Set realistic goals: Break down your writing goals into smaller, manageable tasks. Achieving these small milestones can boost your confidence and motivate you to keep going.
Focus on the process, not just the outcome: Instead of fixating on whether your writing is good enough, focus on the act of writing itself. Enjoy the process of expressing yourself and refining your craft.
One strategy I adopted was to aim for an 87% score, which was the bare minimum to pass my program, instead of always shooting for a perfect 100%. While this might seem like setting a low bar to some, remember that finishing a course is the ultimate goal. Feedback is a great tool, but it's important to be choosy about whose opinions you take to heart. Not all advice is beneficial, so it's best to seek constructive criticism from people you admire and trust. There are resources like writing centers, peer tutors, or department specialists that can provide valuable assistance.
Practicing mindfulness, such as meditation, can help you observe your thoughts and feelings without judgment. This can lead to a more balanced view of your writing and yourself. When you achieve something, no matter how small, take a moment to acknowledge and celebrate it. This can help combat negative self-talk and boost your confidence. Remember why you love writing and reconnect with your passion for storytelling or self-expression. Keeping your purpose in mind can help you push through moments of self-doubt.
Finally, if self-criticism starts to feel overwhelming, it's perfectly fine to take a breather. Sometimes, taking a short break from your writing can bring fresh clarity and perspective.
Dr. Kelly recommends the following next steps:
Thank you!
Genevieve
Briana Pelle, MS, CCC-SLP
Speech language pathology
149
Answers
Nashville, Tennessee
Updated
Briana’s Answer
Hi, Genevieve,
Writing is all about practice! What many people mistake about practice is that they think the final product needs to be "good." But that is not the case- we don't practice what we're already great at. We practice what needs improvement, and that gradual improvement is what you should aim for. Here are a few practice tips for writing:
- Read! Read the work you think is impressive and well written. If you have a certain story in mind, read everything you can that is similar. This helps you understand the genre and tropes and cliches.
- Use a prompt generator for writing practice. If you can't think of what to write, this is a great way to get an idea.
- Experiment with writing in styles, genres, and formats that you are uncomfortable with. Examples- writing in first, second, or third person; writing action, drama, romance, or horror; writing poetry, a play, a script.
- Do a writing exercise where you try to write a small blurb in the style of another writer. Example: write the same general story in the "voice" of F Scott Fitzgerald or Agatha Christie. What gives them their voice? What makes their writing distinctive? This helps you figure out what makes YOUR writing distinctive.
- Try to write a little bit every day.
- Pinpoint ONE THING you want to practice with your daily writing. Example: write one paragraph focused on world building, on flow, on dialogue, etc.
Good luck!
Writing is all about practice! What many people mistake about practice is that they think the final product needs to be "good." But that is not the case- we don't practice what we're already great at. We practice what needs improvement, and that gradual improvement is what you should aim for. Here are a few practice tips for writing:
- Read! Read the work you think is impressive and well written. If you have a certain story in mind, read everything you can that is similar. This helps you understand the genre and tropes and cliches.
- Use a prompt generator for writing practice. If you can't think of what to write, this is a great way to get an idea.
- Experiment with writing in styles, genres, and formats that you are uncomfortable with. Examples- writing in first, second, or third person; writing action, drama, romance, or horror; writing poetry, a play, a script.
- Do a writing exercise where you try to write a small blurb in the style of another writer. Example: write the same general story in the "voice" of F Scott Fitzgerald or Agatha Christie. What gives them their voice? What makes their writing distinctive? This helps you figure out what makes YOUR writing distinctive.
- Try to write a little bit every day.
- Pinpoint ONE THING you want to practice with your daily writing. Example: write one paragraph focused on world building, on flow, on dialogue, etc.
Good luck!
Thank you so much Briana! I LOVE Agatha Christie, and I've always admired her ability to write convincing dialogue.
Genevieve
Jessica Baris
Writer and Editor
4
Answers
San Diego, California
Updated
Jessica’s Answer
Hi Genevieve,
In the moment you are feeling self-critical or self-doubt, think about what you would tell someone you care about who was feeling the same way. It's likely that you would tell someone you care about to not get discouraged and that there is something special in them that they can bring out with more time and practice! Every day we are all practicing and growing, whether it is as a writer, athlete, biologist, pianist....!
Expressing yourself becomes easier with regular practice. It's like anything else -- the more you do it, the easier it becomes. A great dancer or a great cook is great because they put in the many hours it takes to learn the craft. Enjoy the process of learning!
I agree with all the action steps Briana provided -- those are great ways to start improving. I especially agree with writing a little bit each day. Studies show that doing an activity a little bit each day helps you improve more than doing it for a longer period of time but not as often. So writing for 15 minutes a day every day is better than writing for just 1 hour once a week.
It also helps to put on a timer. Having a timer running helps you focus. Instead of sitting there with a bunch of time passing by and feeling frustrated or wondering what to write about, you know your timer is counting down 15 minutes so you get motivated to write as much as you can before your timer runs out.
Writing is a really special process of self-expression and self-exploration. Even writing a draft of something I don't think is great is still an accomplishment, because I made the effort to do it, and I still have something that I created out of nothing, and that thing can be worked on and improved. You said writing is something you've wanted to do since being a little girl. It sounds like it is something that calls to you, so I encourage you to keep at it!
In the moment you are feeling self-critical or self-doubt, think about what you would tell someone you care about who was feeling the same way. It's likely that you would tell someone you care about to not get discouraged and that there is something special in them that they can bring out with more time and practice! Every day we are all practicing and growing, whether it is as a writer, athlete, biologist, pianist....!
Expressing yourself becomes easier with regular practice. It's like anything else -- the more you do it, the easier it becomes. A great dancer or a great cook is great because they put in the many hours it takes to learn the craft. Enjoy the process of learning!
I agree with all the action steps Briana provided -- those are great ways to start improving. I especially agree with writing a little bit each day. Studies show that doing an activity a little bit each day helps you improve more than doing it for a longer period of time but not as often. So writing for 15 minutes a day every day is better than writing for just 1 hour once a week.
It also helps to put on a timer. Having a timer running helps you focus. Instead of sitting there with a bunch of time passing by and feeling frustrated or wondering what to write about, you know your timer is counting down 15 minutes so you get motivated to write as much as you can before your timer runs out.
Writing is a really special process of self-expression and self-exploration. Even writing a draft of something I don't think is great is still an accomplishment, because I made the effort to do it, and I still have something that I created out of nothing, and that thing can be worked on and improved. You said writing is something you've wanted to do since being a little girl. It sounds like it is something that calls to you, so I encourage you to keep at it!
Jessica, thank you so much for the encouragement! I really appreciate you taking the time to write such a lovely response. :)
Genevieve