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How do I tell my parents that I didn't make it into my dream school?

I was really excited to go and we spent a lot of time and money on visits and making arrangements in case I was accepted. Now I didn't even make it through the first round of applicants. I don't know how to bring it up to my parents without making it sound like it isn't a big deal.

#RejectionLettersAreActuallyARealThing #rejection #college-rejection #college-applications

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Hamza S.’s Answer

Dear Cameron,


Dont be afraid! your parents are your biggest fans and supporters. Just sit them down and tell them what is going on!. They will always have your best intentions at heart so why would you worry about what they will think, they will be proud that you were honest. Which goes a long way, and then you an plan of attack for what you need to do next to be successful.


Hamza Haqqi M.A., PHR

CEO/Founder Learnza™ , LLC

Healthcare Recruiter LocuMatch, LLC 

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Alex’s Answer

Dear Cameron,

It is completely okay for you to feel upset that you did not get into your dream school, and communicating your disappointment to your parents might actually be a good thing. Often times, the people close to us can sense when we are upset and so allowing them to see that and offer comfort can be a good thing for both parties. That being said, focus on the positive. Many people don't get into their dream school on their first try, and that's alright. It doesn't mean you can go to another school and get a good education that helps take you to your goals. I got rejected by my dream school both as an undergrad and grad student, but in the end I still got a master's degree and job in my field of psychology. Being rejected was disappointing at first, but can help us consider options we hadn't really considered before and lead us down a different path. I ended up really enjoying the colleges I ended up at and meeting amazing people and professors, just like you are going to do.

So take a moment to breathe, mourn the loss, but accept the opportunity to explore other potential schools. Remember that family is supposed to be here to support you, both in celebrating your achievements and sharing in your disappointment. You are more than the college you go to, the important thing is to make the most of your college experience wherever you choose to be.
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Jerry’s Answer

Hi Cameron,

I'm sorry that you didn't get into your "first-choice" school !! Obviously, I don't know the kind of relationship you have with your parents. But, I think that they will feel badly that you are disappointed and not want you to feel worse because you have to tell them the bad news.

The best thing is to tell them as soon as possible, as well as tell them what your "Plan B" is going to be. If you don't have a list of other colleges that interest you, tell your parents the news anyway. They will appreciate just talking with you about your life and future aspirations !!

Then, develop a list of other potential colleges that fit your "profile". There are plenty of very good colleges and universities that will accept students like you (similar grades and test scores and extracurricular activities). And, many of them are within your geographic range (how far you wish to travel for college) and are affordable by your family, with or without financial aid. Hopefully, there is a guidance counselor or teacher at your present school who can assist you with this list.

Best wishes for your future success !!

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Frank’s Answer

Cameron

It's ok you did not get into your dream school. Think about how and what you want to discuss with your parents.

I suggest keeping it simple, something along the lines of telling them: you did not get accepted, that you tried your best, are disappointed, appreciate their time and effort in supporting you and what school (s) you would now like to focus on

You don't need to think of or prepare for every detail. Get the conversation started with your key thoughts and let it flow from there.

Hope you have a good conversation with them. Best wishes

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