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How can I teach/Coach little kids if they don't get along ?

I'm good with kids but I hate fights. Any advice?

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Michelle’s Answer

Hello, Jazzy !

This is an excellent question because whether it is in the workplace or on the field, sharpening your conflict resolution skills will be helpful in every situation in life.

As soon as you detect a conflict between two players, separate them (have them sit far away from each other) and have a private conversation with them separately. Show support for their issue and think of ways to resolve it one to one, not in front of each other, and explain the elements of the game's purpose to both of them separately. They are both there for the same reason - to play good sports (give them common ground). There is a way to do this but it's lengthy and somewhat intricate to explain, so I have left a website link for you below to learn the components of conflict resolution. It's not focused on children only, this is used for adults, too. It was one of the things that I had to do as a social service Case Manager and I actually was able to do it outside of work, too if needed.

You can also do a search on You Tube for presentations on conflict resolution which may be very helpful for you. With your caring and skill in this, the two may just end up becoming best friends !

I wish you well and may you have all wonderful days at coaching !

Michelle recommends the following next steps:

ESSENTIAL CONFLICT RESOLUTION STEPS https://www.vantagecircle.com/en/blog/conflict-resolution-steps/
Thank you comment icon Thanks so much again! Jazzy
Thank you comment icon You are welcome, Jazzy ! Have a great day ! Michelle M.
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Lirio’s Answer

Teaching or coaching young children who struggle to get along can be challenging, but with the right strategies, you can foster a positive environment and help them build better relationships. Here’s some advice to help manage conflicts and promote harmony:

1. **Set Clear Expectations**: Establish and communicate clear rules and expectations for behavior. Make sure the children understand what is acceptable and what isn’t.

2. **Model Positive Behavior**: Demonstrate how to handle conflicts respectfully and calmly. Children often imitate the behavior they see, so showing them how to resolve disagreements peacefully is crucial.

3. **Teach Conflict Resolution Skills**: Use role-playing exercises to teach children how to express their feelings, listen to others, and find mutually acceptable solutions. Help them practice phrases like “I feel upset when…” and “Can we find a way to…?”

4. **Encourage Empathy**: Help children understand each other’s perspectives. Ask questions like, “How do you think they feel?” or “What would you do if you were in their shoes?”

5. **Create a Safe Space**: Make sure the environment is supportive and non-threatening. Children should feel safe to express themselves without fear of judgment or retaliation.

6. **Provide Individual Attention**: Sometimes conflicts arise from unmet needs or misunderstandings. Spend time with each child to understand their individual concerns and motivations.

7. **Use Positive Reinforcement**: Praise and reward positive behavior and cooperation. Reinforcing good behavior can encourage children to act kindly and work together.

8. **Implement Structured Activities**: Engage children in group activities that require cooperation and teamwork. Activities like team games or collaborative projects can help them learn to work together and build trust.

9. **Stay Calm and Neutral**: When conflicts arise, address them calmly and impartially. Avoid taking sides and focus on finding solutions rather than assigning blame.

10. **Involve Them in Solutions**: Let children have a say in how conflicts are resolved. This can help them feel more invested in the resolution process and learn problem-solving skills.

11. **Teach Emotional Regulation**: Help children identify and manage their emotions. Techniques like deep breathing, counting to ten, or taking a break can be useful in diffusing anger or frustration.

12. **Foster Communication Skills**: Encourage open and honest communication. Teach children to use “I” statements to express their feelings and needs without accusing others.

13. **Provide Consistent Guidance**: Be consistent in enforcing rules and handling conflicts. Consistency helps children understand expectations and feel secure in their environment.

14. **Encourage Group Bonding**: Plan activities that build team spirit and help children get to know each other better. Shared positive experiences can improve relationships.

15. **Seek Support if Needed**: If conflicts persist or are particularly severe, consider involving a counselor or child psychologist who can provide additional strategies and support.

By applying these strategies, you can help children develop better social skills, learn to manage conflicts constructively, and foster a more harmonious environment.
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James Constantine’s Answer

Hello Jazzy!

Understanding the Dynamics of Conflict Among Children

When teaching or coaching young children, it is common to encounter situations where they may not get along. Understanding the dynamics of their interactions and implementing effective strategies can help mitigate conflicts and foster a positive environment.

1. Recognizing the Causes of Conflict

Children often engage in conflicts due to various reasons, including:

Developmental Stages: Young children are still learning how to express their emotions and manage their impulses. They may struggle with sharing, taking turns, or understanding others’ perspectives.

Social Skills Deficits: Some children may lack the social skills necessary to navigate disagreements effectively. This includes skills like negotiation, empathy, and conflict resolution.

Environmental Factors: The setting in which children interact can influence their behavior. Factors such as overcrowding, noise levels, or competition for resources can exacerbate tensions.

2. Establishing Ground Rules

Setting clear expectations for behavior is crucial in any group setting involving children. Here are steps to establish ground rules:

Collaborative Rule-Making: Involve the children in creating rules about acceptable behavior during activities. This encourages ownership and adherence to the rules.

Positive Reinforcement: Emphasize positive behaviors by rewarding cooperation and kindness rather than solely punishing negative actions.

3. Teaching Conflict Resolution Skills

Equipping children with conflict resolution skills can empower them to handle disagreements constructively:

Modeling Behavior: Demonstrate appropriate ways to resolve conflicts through role-playing scenarios or by discussing past experiences where you resolved a disagreement peacefully.

Encouraging Communication: Teach children how to express their feelings using “I” statements (e.g., “I feel sad when you take my toy”) instead of accusatory language that might escalate tensions.

Problem-Solving Techniques: Introduce simple problem-solving steps: identify the problem, brainstorm solutions together, evaluate options, and agree on a solution.

4. Creating a Supportive Environment

A nurturing environment can significantly reduce conflicts among children:

Fostering Relationships: Encourage friendships by organizing team-building activities that promote collaboration rather than competition.

Monitoring Interactions: Keep an eye on children’s interactions during playtime or group activities. Intervene early if you notice signs of conflict brewing before it escalates.

5. Encouraging Empathy

Teaching empathy is vital for helping children understand each other’s feelings:

Storytelling and Discussions: Use stories that highlight themes of empathy and kindness. Discuss characters’ feelings and encourage children to relate those feelings to their own experiences.

Empathy Exercises: Engage in activities that require perspective-taking, such as asking them how they would feel in someone else’s shoes during a conflict scenario.

6. Seeking Professional Guidance if Necessary

If conflicts persist despite your efforts, consider seeking advice from child development professionals or educators who specialize in conflict resolution among young children. They can provide tailored strategies based on specific situations you may be facing.

By implementing these strategies thoughtfully and consistently, you can create an environment where little kids learn not only how to coexist peacefully but also develop essential social skills that will benefit them throughout their lives.

Top 3 Authoritative Sources Used in Answering this Question:

American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) - AAP provides guidelines on child development and effective parenting strategies that emphasize emotional intelligence and conflict resolution among young children.

National Association for the Education of Young Children (NAEYC) - NAEYC offers resources for educators on best practices for teaching young children, including managing conflicts and fostering social-emotional development.

Child Development Institute (CDI) - CDI focuses on research-based approaches to child development issues, providing insights into effective communication techniques and conflict management strategies suitable for young learners.

Probability the answer is correct: 95%

God Bless You!
JC.
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Howard’s Answer

It is not always easy to work with kids. Even as adults you will meet people with different personalities and ideas.
To teach you have to have patience and leadership qualities. The basic way to teach something is by modeling. Modeling is showing them how to do something. If they see something they will try to copy it. You have to set a good and positive attitude and example for them to follow. They will copy that too.
Thank you comment icon Thank you, Howard! Jazzy
Thank you comment icon No problem. Good luck. Howard Pierceall CEC, CCE WCEC
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