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How do you know who you are?

How do you know yourself beyond the output? The LinkedIn? The resume? The work experience? At a young age, I focused on those things that I forgot to know the most. Is there some success metric to know you fully understand yourself?

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John’s Answer

Hi Shaina,

That is a great question! There are many different approaches for understanding who you are, and a few come to mind for measurement. Although, keep in mind that self-discovery is an ongoing process in which we are continually growing and evolving. Who you are might change over time, and that's OK. Goals are just benchmarks to work towards, meet, and surpass. They don't determine your value or worth.

🧘 Meditation is a powerful tool that can help quiet your mind and sharpen your focus. I recommend looking into Zen practices as a methodology for investigating who is observing the phenomena, thoughts and sensations of life.

🌲 Nature is also a great teacher. Putting yourself in the wilderness helps remove distractions and the trappings of culture to really experience and observe the world. Going into nature helps you get in touch with yourself at the core.

⛰️ Challenges are another great way to reveal yourself. How do you respond to challenges, what mindset do you adopt and why, what encourages you to preserver when things get tough? Successfully completing challenges is also a great way to build character and self-worth.

👂Therapy is very helpful for diving deeper to understand why you are the way you are. I think everyone can benefit from therapy and that it should be a normal part of preventative health care. That said, results may vary, and it can take time to find a therapist who is right for you.

🙋🏼‍♂️ Meeting other people is another great way to reflect of who you are and understand how you are perceived by others. Meeting new people helps you reflect on aspects that you like or dislike about others, and yourself. People can also be a great inspiration to better yourself and incorporate some of their positive traits (or avoid their negative traits) to help you discover who you are and who you want to be.

📚 Reading is another great resource for self-discovery. There are many books about self-discovery and personal development.

Measurements:
- There are wheels that break up each part of personality or development into things like: love, family, social, financial, etc. and you can fill in each section depending on where you think you're at. This helps give a high overview of your strengths and weaknesses to consider where you might want to focus efforts.
- Daily inventory: I've seen this technique become more popular, but you make a chart with all of the days of the month/year, then on the other axis you list all of your goals you'd like to accomplish in the perfect day. These are daily habits you'd like to achieve. Then for each day, you fill in the habits that you practice either with colors or symbols. This can also be done with emotions, physical health, etc. instead of habits. Then at the end of the month/year, you can visually see how successful you were in reaching your goals.
- The Myers-Briggs tests helps to uncover your personality, but there are many different types of tests that take different approaches.
- Relationships: while romantic relationships may stem from a deep need for love and connection, they are incredible incubators for creating a reflection in which you learn about yourself. When someone knows you very well on all levels, that relationship can really help you understand yourself better, learn, and grow. Good communication is key here.

In short, you are always growing and changing. Instead of focusing on how well you know yourself, it may be advantageous to assume that you've only begun to uncover who you are. There are many ways to go deeper and find new things. The work then is to assess who you'd like to be and take steps to work towards those goals. This is true both personally and professionally, so it's no coincidence that many people who are very successful professionally are also actively engaged with understanding and developing themselves personally. Knowing who you are, your strengths and weaknesses, your likes and dislikes, helps you show up in the workplace more authentically, which is good for business and will make you a valued asset on any team. Enjoy the journey and keep in mind that this work is never done.
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Dinesh’s Answer

Self-analysis and understanding who you are can be a deeply personal and ongoing journey. Here are some steps and strategies that might help:
Steps for Self-Analysis
1. Reflect on Values and Beliefs: Identify what principles guide you.
2. Assess Strengths and Weaknesses: Use tools like SWOT analysis.
3. Explore Interests and Passions: Find what excites you.
4. Seek Feedback: Get perspectives from others.
5. Reflect on Past Experiences: Learn from significant life events.
6. Set Personal Goals: Define your aspirations.

Strategies for Understanding Yourself
1. Journaling: Write about your thoughts and experiences.
2. Mindfulness and Meditation: Increase awareness of your emotions.
3. Personality Assessments: Use tools like MBTI or Big Five.
4. Therapy or Counseling: Get professional guidance.
5. Continuous Learning: Challenge yourself with new experiences.
6. Self-Compassion: Be patient and kind to yourself.

Dinesh recommends the following next steps:

Strategies for Understanding Yourself
Steps for Self-Analysis
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Aisha’s Answer

Hello Shania,

Embarking on the journey to understand yourself beyond your achievements is a rewarding adventure that lasts a lifetime. Here are some uplifting steps to assist you in this pursuit:

1. Ponder on What Truly Matters: Recognize your core values, passions, strengths, and areas for improvement. Writing in a journal and ranking your values can be beneficial tools in this process.
2. Distinguish Between "Your Actions" and "Your Identity": Concentrate on the person you are outside of your professional roles. Allocate time for solitude and engage in activities purely for enjoyment, rather than for their productivity value.
3. Heed Your Inner Voice: Be mindful of what energizes you or leaves you feeling depleted. Techniques like mindfulness can assist you in becoming more attuned to these feelings.
4. Welcome Personal Growth: Embrace the fact that you are constantly evolving. Align your ambitions with your present self, concentrating on personal satisfaction.
5. Craft Your Own Definition of Success: Establish your own benchmarks, such as tranquility, relationships, or making a difference, rather than focusing on external accomplishments.
6. Solicit Feedback: Seek out the opinions of those you trust about what makes you unique, to gain fresh insights.

The journey of self-discovery is about living a genuine life and cherishing the process. If you're interested in specific exercises to delve further into this, do let me know!
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Yasmine’s Answer

You are the architect of your own identity, and no one else can claim that role. By carving out your own definition of success, establishing your personal milestones, and letting your authentic character and personality shine through, you are shaping your unique self. While your resume and work ethic can significantly contribute to your identity, they don't entirely encapsulate who you are. This is particularly true if you engage in hobbies that bring you joy, both within and beyond your professional sphere. Reflect on the elements that make you a versatile individual, both in your profession and beyond it. Keep in mind that you are not just defined by your work, but also by what you love to do and who you are as a person.
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Nada’s Answer

Fantastic question! You're just embarking on your professional journey, and a world full of exciting experiences is waiting for you. The best guidance I can offer is to focus on what truly sparks joy and passion in you. Consider how you can incorporate these elements into your career. Remember, the perfect job doesn't always exist right away. Instead, focus on acquiring skills that can be useful across various roles - these are your "transferable skills". For instance, roles in customer service are a brilliant way to start, as they allow you to interact with a diverse range of personalities. This is a crucial skill in many professions.

During my school years, I was passionate about Business and Art. So, when I was exploring potential career paths, advertising and marketing stood out as my top choices. I took on several different jobs to hone my business and networking skills. Eventually, I landed a job in advertising, which later transitioned into digital advertising, and finally into software client management. Remember, where you start doesn't define where you'll end up. Each job is merely a stepping stone towards your ultimate goal.

To sum it up, it's all about the journey and maintaining a positive mindset. Prioritize self-care and nurturing a healthy mindset, and let everything else follow naturally.

Nada recommends the following next steps:

what are you passionate about? What are others interested in? Does that interest you?
Check out LinkedIn in at the types of jobs that might be of interest and what those roles are asking for?
Find those 'Transferable skills' that you can find a job for? ask friends, family?
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Aman’s Answer

Hi Shaina,

It's a common experience to focus solely on external accomplishments like LinkedIn profiles or resumes at a young age, but understanding who you are at your core is transformative. One method I recommend is engaging with new experiences and challenges that push you out of your comfort zone. When I was in my early 20s, I took on volunteer projects which not only enriched my skills but also unveiled parts of my personality I wasn't aware of.

Consider exploring activities that ignite passion within you—like joining a local arts community, volunteering for social causes, or even traveling solo. These experiences often promote self-discovery and help you realize what drives you emotionally, socially, and spiritually. During a trip, I once met someone who turned his love for art into a sustainable community project, which helped him realize his strengths aren’t just tied to professional achievements.

Equally important is to embrace failure, which can be an enlightening experience. Through setbacks, you often discover resilience and tenacity that builds character. Reflecting on these experiences helps align your actions with your values, leading to deeper self-understanding. Remember to be patient and gentle with yourself along this journey; it’s all part of the process.

Take care and happy exploring!
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