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How should I apply for jobs with massive anxiety?
I have been diagnosed with anxiety for over ten years and my anxiety is getting the best of me. There are a lot of places hiring and I don’t know how to apply for an interview or how to sound professional. Any recommendations or tips to help?
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3 answers
Updated
Audrey’s Answer
Hi Maggie! Allow me to start by saying I don't have a diagnosed anxiety disorder. I cannot relate to the struggles that you face. I do, however, have ADHD, which can create anxiety...sometimes I feel like I can't shut my brain off! I hope I can offer some help through my own experiences.
In my experience, most jobs have online applications. They will ask you to upload a resume--there are a ton of online resources to help with that--and usually will ask you a few basic questions, like your contact information. They will reach out to you via the contact information you provide to offer an interview that works with your schedule.
One thing I learned over time through countless job interviews is that the person across the table from you is human. He or she, believe it or not, is probably anxious too! Just because someone is in a position to interview others doesn't mean they enjoy it, look forward to it, or want to enforce their authority--a lot of them don't want to make others feel uncomfortable and hate rejecting people. Virtually all of them have been through interviews themselves and remember how stressful it can be. My anxiety told me they were harshly judging every move I made, and I was surprised to hear how friendly and down-to-earth most of them are. Even for graduate school interviews, I found myself breathing a sigh of relief and thinking "hey, he/she was actually really cool!"
Further, if you are fearing rejection, you are not the only thing impacting whether or not you land the role. You have no control over who else applies, how qualified the other applicants are, how desperate they are hiring, if they have a very particular person in mind, etc. Rejection or acceptance into a role involves a lot of moving parts, and all you can do is your best. There are times where you are a perfect applicant, but for a reason outside of your control, you aren't who they will choose right now. This doesn't reflect poorly on you! It's just the way life goes sometimes.
I hope these thoughts help reduce the anxiety associated with applying for jobs. At the end of the day, you can be proud of yourself for trying, even if it doesn't work out. Another step I would take is finding out what anxiety-reducing coping mechanisms work for you. I, for example, get a stress rash on my chest when I am about to interview...even when I feel confident! As silly as this sounds, I learned wearing a nice turtle neck or a high-neck top reduces my anxiety that others will notice. Simple things to comfort yourself make a huge difference.
Good luck, I know you can do it!
In my experience, most jobs have online applications. They will ask you to upload a resume--there are a ton of online resources to help with that--and usually will ask you a few basic questions, like your contact information. They will reach out to you via the contact information you provide to offer an interview that works with your schedule.
One thing I learned over time through countless job interviews is that the person across the table from you is human. He or she, believe it or not, is probably anxious too! Just because someone is in a position to interview others doesn't mean they enjoy it, look forward to it, or want to enforce their authority--a lot of them don't want to make others feel uncomfortable and hate rejecting people. Virtually all of them have been through interviews themselves and remember how stressful it can be. My anxiety told me they were harshly judging every move I made, and I was surprised to hear how friendly and down-to-earth most of them are. Even for graduate school interviews, I found myself breathing a sigh of relief and thinking "hey, he/she was actually really cool!"
Further, if you are fearing rejection, you are not the only thing impacting whether or not you land the role. You have no control over who else applies, how qualified the other applicants are, how desperate they are hiring, if they have a very particular person in mind, etc. Rejection or acceptance into a role involves a lot of moving parts, and all you can do is your best. There are times where you are a perfect applicant, but for a reason outside of your control, you aren't who they will choose right now. This doesn't reflect poorly on you! It's just the way life goes sometimes.
I hope these thoughts help reduce the anxiety associated with applying for jobs. At the end of the day, you can be proud of yourself for trying, even if it doesn't work out. Another step I would take is finding out what anxiety-reducing coping mechanisms work for you. I, for example, get a stress rash on my chest when I am about to interview...even when I feel confident! As silly as this sounds, I learned wearing a nice turtle neck or a high-neck top reduces my anxiety that others will notice. Simple things to comfort yourself make a huge difference.
Good luck, I know you can do it!
You made me realize most other people have some of the same anxieties I do probably. I appreciate this, thank you for the advice.
Maggie
Updated
Mickael’s Answer
Hi Maggie,
I can relate to your experience here. Here is how I tried to cope with the anxiety. I could not cope with it before. It was overwhelming and simply nothing would make me feel better. What worked for me was when the person called my name for the interview.
TAKE a DEEP BREATH ...
1. People want to know YOU, and see if they can trust YOU. Therefore, be proud of who you are, forget all the judgement they might be thinking of (or you think they do) and simply be you.
2. Tell them. Or at least show them you are going through some high emotions but you are dealing with it. They will like that as many recruiters are checking how people do under pressure.
3. Talk. Talk to the person you are getting interviewed by, just as a human to human interaction, prior the interview officially starts. It did help me.
4. Prepare your talk before. Know by heart your resume, your projects, your experience, anything in the resume that you wrote. There will be questions you haven't thought about, just be honest in answering them, even if you think that does not show the best of you. The more you work on the basic questions, the less the anxiety will have an impact on the answers because they will be automatic.
5. If there is anything that helps you, do it if you can. For me, that was (1) drinking and (2) fidgeting. Actually one of my recruiter asked me I was so nervous, and I just replied as honestly as I could and I got that job :)
I can't remember exactly what was my answer but it was around the lines of I am extremely stressed out right now so that allows me to actually have a coherent discussion with you.
6. Know beforehand that because the recruiter is trying to know if betting on you is the right thing to do, and they have that small amount of time, they are challenging, on purpose. It's not you, it is not out of sadistic pleasure, it's just that this is the only way to get to the bottom of someone in small amount of time. So hard questions are fine to be re-asked, to be started simply on it and so on. In fact, that may show the recruiter how you deal with complexity.
7. If you failed getting the position, that does not mean you're a failure yourself. That means that they find someone that shows a better fit. that maybe because of that anxiety, or simply because they did not find some advantages another candidate showed. In any case, remember the questions that you were asked, and use them for step 4.
In fact, something that helped me was talking. Talking about me and how I helped the projects I worked on, how I sometimes failed finding problems and how I finally overcame them. While talking, anxiety was not there.
You will need to find what makes you relax and feel comfortable enough to not have that anxiety getting the best of you. If drinking a sip before answering helps, tell the recruiter this is why you are doing so. They should understand, if not, then maybe you should not get that job anyway for the best.
Remember that even though you need that job hard, that the recruiter is trying to judge you and compare you to the job position, that recruiter is still a human being that has emotions and brain.
I sincerely hope it helps.
I can relate to your experience here. Here is how I tried to cope with the anxiety. I could not cope with it before. It was overwhelming and simply nothing would make me feel better. What worked for me was when the person called my name for the interview.
TAKE a DEEP BREATH ...
1. People want to know YOU, and see if they can trust YOU. Therefore, be proud of who you are, forget all the judgement they might be thinking of (or you think they do) and simply be you.
2. Tell them. Or at least show them you are going through some high emotions but you are dealing with it. They will like that as many recruiters are checking how people do under pressure.
3. Talk. Talk to the person you are getting interviewed by, just as a human to human interaction, prior the interview officially starts. It did help me.
4. Prepare your talk before. Know by heart your resume, your projects, your experience, anything in the resume that you wrote. There will be questions you haven't thought about, just be honest in answering them, even if you think that does not show the best of you. The more you work on the basic questions, the less the anxiety will have an impact on the answers because they will be automatic.
5. If there is anything that helps you, do it if you can. For me, that was (1) drinking and (2) fidgeting. Actually one of my recruiter asked me I was so nervous, and I just replied as honestly as I could and I got that job :)
I can't remember exactly what was my answer but it was around the lines of I am extremely stressed out right now so that allows me to actually have a coherent discussion with you.
6. Know beforehand that because the recruiter is trying to know if betting on you is the right thing to do, and they have that small amount of time, they are challenging, on purpose. It's not you, it is not out of sadistic pleasure, it's just that this is the only way to get to the bottom of someone in small amount of time. So hard questions are fine to be re-asked, to be started simply on it and so on. In fact, that may show the recruiter how you deal with complexity.
7. If you failed getting the position, that does not mean you're a failure yourself. That means that they find someone that shows a better fit. that maybe because of that anxiety, or simply because they did not find some advantages another candidate showed. In any case, remember the questions that you were asked, and use them for step 4.
In fact, something that helped me was talking. Talking about me and how I helped the projects I worked on, how I sometimes failed finding problems and how I finally overcame them. While talking, anxiety was not there.
You will need to find what makes you relax and feel comfortable enough to not have that anxiety getting the best of you. If drinking a sip before answering helps, tell the recruiter this is why you are doing so. They should understand, if not, then maybe you should not get that job anyway for the best.
Remember that even though you need that job hard, that the recruiter is trying to judge you and compare you to the job position, that recruiter is still a human being that has emotions and brain.
I sincerely hope it helps.
I’ll try these tips, thanks you!
Maggie
Updated
Shayla’s Answer
Hey, there Maggie! I completely understand how anxiety can make interviews and job applications tough, but I've got some advice that's really helped me and I hope it can help you too!
1. Practice makes perfect! Try using platforms like LinkedIn or YouTube, where you can find free practice interviews and advice on what to say when faced with those tricky questions from potential employers.
2. Become a company expert! When you know a lot about the company you're applying to, it not only shows your genuine interest in them but also helps soothe your anxiety about what they might ask you during the interview.
3. Check out the STAR method! This approach helps you structure your responses to behavioral-based interview questions by focusing on the specific Situation, Task, Action, and Result. It's great because it's all about you and the experiences you've had in previous roles.
Remember, it’s totally possible that the person interviewing you is just as nervous, if not more, due to the nature of their job and the questions they need to ask. Anxiety is normal when facing something new, but it doesn't have to take over. Wishing you the best of luck, Maggie!
1. Practice makes perfect! Try using platforms like LinkedIn or YouTube, where you can find free practice interviews and advice on what to say when faced with those tricky questions from potential employers.
2. Become a company expert! When you know a lot about the company you're applying to, it not only shows your genuine interest in them but also helps soothe your anxiety about what they might ask you during the interview.
3. Check out the STAR method! This approach helps you structure your responses to behavioral-based interview questions by focusing on the specific Situation, Task, Action, and Result. It's great because it's all about you and the experiences you've had in previous roles.
Remember, it’s totally possible that the person interviewing you is just as nervous, if not more, due to the nature of their job and the questions they need to ask. Anxiety is normal when facing something new, but it doesn't have to take over. Wishing you the best of luck, Maggie!
Thank you! I will definitely have to try these.
Maggie